Monday, August 8, 2011

Sometimes It Pours

I've been trying to avoid doing a post like this for...pretty much forever. As open as I am online, there are some things that I just don't like to talk about. It isn't that I'm trying to hide them, they just aren't fun subjects so I don't bring them up.

This time, I don't feel like I really have a choice because it's affecting too much of my life.

For those of you who don't know, I suffer from depression. Most of the time, I can keep it under control and when it gets bad, it only gets bad for a few days before I pull out of it. At worst, I'll disappear from Twitter and Facebook for a bit, but usually I'm of the whole "fake it 'til you make it" school of thought and put on my happy face and plow through.

This time it hasn't been a few days though, it's been a few months.

The worst part is, objectively, it's been a really great few months: lots of travel (which I love), won the first writing contest I've entered in ages, sold a novella, got to hang with some of my best friends, kids are good, husband's good. Basically, life is good.

That doesn't matter to depression though.

Happy moments, no matter how big, have been fleeting at best, and everything in my life feels nothing short of overwhelming. I know some people have noticed that beyond the travel issue, I've been rather scarce on twitter. On my better days, I'm there a little bit, but for the most part it's one more thing that feels like too much.

So, as much as it pains me to do it, I'm going to pull back on some things. Any blog posts and whatnot that I've committed to, I'll still get done, but posts here (and at my other blog) will likely be very brief. I'm going to try to get some reviews in for Wicked Lil Pixie still, but until I get a handle on my life again, I don't know how often they'll show up. For now, I need to focus as much as I can on the writing part of my job (because 1-it's my job and 2-it actually helps the depression sometimes) and my family.

I'm not going to to disappear entirely or anything, I just need to get control of things again.

I hope you'll all bear with me. <3

5 comments:

  1. *hugs* Depression is a bitch. I've dealt with it for years so I understand. Do what you need to in order to take care of yourself. We'll be here.

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  2. Danielle La PagliaAugust 8, 2011 at 9:53 PM

    You have to take care of you first. We'll be here if you need us. *hugs*

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  3. I'm sorry you're struggling with this. I know how difficult it can be to muster the energy/motivation/faith in yourself to get things done when depression is trying to sink you down. Don't forget about your pals in OWG - there are always ears available there.

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  4. Just take care of yourself. You're one of the authors it's been a delight to meet through Carina Press -- a wonderfully warm, friendly person who has helped make social media fun (rather than torture!) for me. Take the time you need for you to enjoy your family, your writing, your life. (((hugs)))

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  5. Ah, depression. I know it well. Been there, still go there and really, when it hits you about all you can do is take care of yourself and hopefully pamper your way out of it...

    I honestly do know this place...write me if you need to 'talk' about it.

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